This month came off to a great start. It’s going well. I have the support of my friends. I’m getting what I have to done. I’m recording and documenting. Life is great, especially after I fell off the grid a bit towards the end of February. Remember: When you’re going through a tough time, things always gets worse before they get better.
I’ve met new friends this year. Now, it’s never my intention to meet new friends. I always talk to people I come across and that’s that; however, I realize that the best friendship comes unexpectedly. It’s amazing, and it beautiful, and it’s so beneficial because you learn about others, yet you learn about yourself. It’s a way of self-developement.
Yesterday afterschool, Ces and I did our make-up. We were getting ready to go climb trees and hike with a photographer who wanted to shoot photos of us. He never made it.
Ces and I try to catch a sunset at least once every week, if not twice. We love it. I never had a friend to go out and play make-belief with. We will pretend we’re animals, or we’re getting chased or we’re lost and make the best of it.
I never knew how wild and adventurous I was because I was always fearful and she helped open up a new door for me. I love it. Being outside and surrounded by nothing but trees, and grass and dirt is beautiful. It gives me the ultimate high to life. I would choose this high over a substance high anyday.
I just wanted to post a video so that I at least keep up with my goal. I am still learning on how to edit and use Youtube, so bear with me please.
I’ve decided for now that I will be doing book reviews. I am currently reading Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kyosaki.
Fitness/Life video will be uploaded as soon as I get the hang of editing.
I made it through February. I must say a lot of time I was easily distracted, or just distracted. I wasn’t able to focus, but that was because I didn’t allow myself to. I noticed times when I caught myself distracted, I was able to control what I want to focus on. I was aware and sometimes I was able to snap out of it, however, in some case I was too caught up in my emotions and thoughts I allowed the distraction to take its toll over me.
So what did I learn February?
I was able to identify my fear and weaknesses:
Fear of rejection: I’m afraid of rejecting others and I’m afraid of being rejected. That’s why I fear asking questions, and that’s why I fear no’s, even if the “no” is the worse that could possibly happen.
Fear of judgement: I’m frightful of other’s opinion. I know everyone is going to judge one another. I know that people don’t even care about me more than half the time. I’m afraid. of other’s opinion, and I’m afraid of looking anything that’s negative to another’s eye.
Being alone: I was able to be alone half of the month, and I hated it. I’m learning to love it, but I’m so used to having supports around me. Having a friend by my side. Doing things with other, that when I’m alone; I do nothing.
It’s March and I’ve met new friends, and I have my old friends. I think it’s time that I do things alone. If I’m afraid, I’ll find someone who’s not afraid to take that extra step with me. At least I will still put in action.
1. I will take more risk: business and adventures
2. I will conversate more with others. I will ask question. I will start and be in control of the conversation
3. I will have more alone time.
I finally got a chance to upload my first Youtube video (intro).
If you get a chance, please watch and subscribe 😀
My goal is to post every week, every other week, or once a month.
My videos will have some of my work out routine, my meals, my goals and what I’m doing to execute it, and other daily live activity.
This week is coming to an end and I must say I haven’t gotten anything done. I can’t use my feelings as an excuse and I can’t use words to justify my wasted time.
I’m afraid, I’m hurting, I’m alone and I’m letting all these emotions effect my daily decisions. I have to learn to put my emotions aside and FOCUS.
Fear is apart of being who we are. It’s a part of being human. We’re often told to be strong. If we can’t face our fear or get over it, that makes us a coward. It makes us a weakling. It shows that we are not capable of doing what we want to do or have to do because we’re too afraid to do it.We set goals and don’t accomplish it because in our mind it’s easy to do, whereas conducting our goals take effort, time, and risk. We’re afraid to take risk.
I love the idea of challenges, I love the idea of risks and dangers. However, when it comes down to it, I’m afraid. Afraid of what? I don’t know. I have yet to figure myself out.
Robert T. Kyosaki states, “It is said that the fear of public speaking is a fear greater than death for most people. According to psychiatrists, the fear of public speaking is caused by the fear of ostracism, the fear of standing out, the fear of criticism, the fear of ridicule, the fear of being an outcast. THE FEAR OF BEING DIFFERENT PREVENTS MOST PEOPLE FROM SEEKING NEW WAYS TO SOLVE THEIR PROBLEMS.”
So how do we go about facing our fear? How do we accept it? Fear is in our brain, it’s always going to be a part of us. We can deny it, but one thing everyone has in common is we’re all afraid of something. Whether it be personal, finance, death, it can be anything.